Family and friends love to spend time together. However, it can be a daunting and expensive experience to have fun with the ones you love.  In this article, you will find out how to hang out on a budget and have a great time while at it.

Here are five ways to have fun with family and friends:

Board Games

Super cheap yet functional, board games are a window to a fun time with loved ones. From scrabble to ludo, chess and monopoly, there is a wide range of games to choose from and explore without stress. Think about it.

Chat & Chill

Think mouth, not fingers. In the world today, phones double as both necessity and distraction. Knowing when to put your phone aside while hanging out with the ones you love and talking stuff out is a great way to bond and relax. From trading stories to speaking on topical issues to pass the time, chatting with your family members remains a great pastime for any friendship circle and family.  

Plan Picnics

Food is fuel for the body and eyes. It also gives you something to look forward to no matter the location. Arranging a picnic with finger foods and main dishes keeps the mouth busy while serving as a key to creating memorable moments. Add a visit to the wonderful outdoors on a hill or in a valley, and time out with family is settled and sorted. Try it out this Saturday if you can, your family bond will become better for it.  

Watch Waves

You don’t have to be a water lover to enjoy this activity. A visit to the beach is enough to make you and your family excited, refreshed and relaxed. It is not only a chance to feel the sand between your toes but also pocket-friendly if it is well-planned. All you have to do is locate a beach close to you and have fun with the one you love.

Now that you have options to choose from, family timeout promises to be better and easier. Make out time for one or all of the activities stated today.  

Enjoyed this article? Like, comment and share with the people you love today! 

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To save you the stress of moving all around the market in order to get the products, here is a list of some baby stores you can visit in Nigeria:

Mothercare Nigeria

Mothercare is a Retail store that deals with baby products, clothing, toys, maternity clothes and every other nursery item. Their store can be found at the Victoria Island, Eti Osa, Lagos and few other places in Lagos.

As an expectant mother, you can visit them to get your quality product at very good and affordable rates.

Yeshua Babies

For expectant mothers that will prefer to do their shopping on the mainland, you can visit the Yeshua Babies store at Isolo Lagos. They provide products and services for babies and adolescent. You can also shop for your baby snacks at this store.

 Simply infants

Just as the name implies, this retail store deals with everything you need as an expectant mother. Their goal is to make shopping easy for their customers even while supplying them the best products and services. They products are mainly gotten from the United States of America, just to ensure that their clients gets the best.

They also take supplies for people outside Lagos, which they will be simply delivered to your doorstep.

New Bee

Newbee.ng is an online store that provides fast delivery services for mothers that are quite busy and would want to spend less time running around buying stuffs at the market. They deal in baby diapers, baby food, formula and different toys the baby that make do with. All you are required to do is to visit the stores to make the purchase right in the comfort of your home which will be delivered to school as soon as expected.

Cradlepal Kiddies Limited

This store specializes in children clothing, accessories, maternity wears and wears for the nursing mothers. They serve children of any age range with quality products and services.

They can be located at the Arena shopping complex at oshodi Lagos.

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Kindly see below the tips to assist you in setting up your child for success this year and the next…

Discover Why Your Child Misbehaves

When your child misbehaves, it connotes that he/she is troubled. Hence there is a need is ask WHY. Why will your 10 year old daughter not sleep at night? or ever stop arguing? Why is she behind in her school works? Seeking to know WHY would better help the parents manage their children’s behaviour without having to use manipulative gimmicks such as punishments and rewards.

Understand Your Child’s Psychological Makeup

When you understand your child’s psychological makeup, you naturally abandon the physical motivation aforementioned.  Every child craves for success. They want to be the best in the environment they find themselves. The job of the parent, therefore,  is to discover the child’s natural niche – Where he or she can perform optimally.

Consider the Match Between Your Child and The Environment

If your child finds pleasure in singing, pay more attention to it by enrolling her in a music school. If your child develops a flair for repairing things early in life, it is an indication that he/she will do well in an engineering school. By constructively putting round pegs in round holes, your child will be less likely to be frustrated. She will be more likely to be happy. A happy child seldom misbehaves.

Let Your Expectations Be in Accordance with Your Child’s Temperament

Having positive, realistic expectations for your child’s achievements and behaviour is something to strive for. You would not expect your slightly reserved child on the basketball team. Also, you would not expect your playful child to do so well in the computer programming session which requires complete concentration. Do not assume that you can change your child’s innate biology to suit the school or the role. Instead set your expectations where your kids can flourish.

Finally, three questions would guide you to maintain a successful school year for your child.

Have you noticed anything about your child school setting?

What are your expectations based on the settings?

Does the setting fit the child’s personality? if these three questions are not answered satisfactorily then perhaps you need a re-think.

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Office Weekend Outfit

A pencil denim skirt without any form of distress  would be prefect for a weekend work outfit, pair with white shirt and sneakers to create a laid-back chic look.

Double Denim

Just pair the A line sleek pencil skirt with a light shade of denim shirt,down tied at the waist, and change up the look with accessories like a statement sunshades and strappy heels

Personalized Tee

Instead of a tight mini skirt, choose a more full midi denim skirt. Add an attitude with any graphic tee It’s a little more retro but it’s so unique and fun.

Everything Statement But Calm

Ladies, this is one look I would absolutely rock!! Statement blouse + cocky handbag + gladiator sandals= Unique outfit.

Party Time

Girls night out? yes please! Opt for a longer pencil denim skirt and add a crop top. This is a great going out look. It is so  chic and effortless.

Accessorize 

If you are not a fan of mini skirt, try on a denim midi skirts! Look how cute this looks with a plain tank and bright accessories.

Photo source: Google Images

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Many years ago it was almost impossible for inter tribal marriages to take place, the tug of war that parents engage in before consenting to either of their children getting married to someone from a different tribe was disturbing.

I know a couple who dated for 8 years with the intention of getting married but this wish never saw day light because of their ethic differences. It hurts so bad that it took them a while before they could let go of each other.

However some people have been lucky enough to be able cross the huddles of inter-ethnic differences before marriage but have no idea of what awaits them in marriage. Issues rise from not speaking same language, different choice of favourite meals, children upbringing, situational perception etc. This is statements like “this is how it is done in my place” comes up.

Getting married to your spouse means you are starting a new life and a new family, so be free to imbibe new things and accommodate new ideas. If you are about to walk this path , here are some tips to help you journey through.

Be On Your “A” Game

Have you ever heard the saying ‘First impression lasts long”? It is important you put on your “A” game when meeting your intending in-laws, being your best is necessary. Do not get me wrong, I am not asking you to go break your purse in a bit to try look good/create an impression.

You are required to be of best behavior, neatly dressed and above all be yourself. You would not want your first meeting with them to leave a bad impression of who you are. This is the time to show them you are ready to be a part of their family and culture.

Avoid Being Stereotyped

I advise you neglect stereotyped thoughts, either Yoruba, Igbo, Hausa etc, every culture has its uniqueness. Be open- minded to learn new things : a new thought, perception, idea or even lifestyle.

For example the method the Igbo’s cook their fufu (starch) is not applicable to the Yoruba’s.  This will save you from the stress of having things done your own way and facing the rejection of your In-laws later. Remember there is beauty in learning new things.

Highlight Your Cultural Values To Your Spouse

As a Yoruba lady, kneeling while greeting elders is part of our culture. In other tribes however their simple courtesy is to bow for elders.

Before introducing your spouse to your parents highlight your cultural values most especially the ones your family hold in high esteem so as to enable him or her find feel a little more welcoming in your family.

Bridge The Language Barrier

It is so annoying when seated in the midst of nonspeaking language people and you do not understand what they are talking about. So as not to let your spouse be left out of any discussion, explaining to her or replying back in English would save him/her a lot of stress and prevent confusion/misunderstanding.

Patience is a Virtue

In this part of the world, when you get married, you are getting married to your spouse’s family. There are times the family will get on your nerves, but patience is required so as not to cause a rift between your spouse and his/her family members. Do not unleash your frustrations on your spouse when there is a misunderstanding.

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Susan almost lost her mind when she answered the door bell to her apartment, seeing her mother-in-law at the door post with her luggage. Mama, this time around, came with Nkiru a far distance relative. Mama just left Susan’s home 2 weeks ago after staying for a month. Susan in her shocked state flashed a smile welcoming her mother-in-law and Nkiru with a warm reception.

“Obi, did mama tell you she will be coming to Lagos” Susan asked her husband over the phone. Apparently mama decided to stop by without prior notice again, her last stay was a living hell for Susan, Mama complains about everything “Too much salt in the food, too much Maggi, too much pepper, why are you wasting my son’s money buying gas can’t you cook with fire wood” who does that in the city, cook with fire wood!

Susan had made up her mind to opt out of her 18 months marriage, if her husband continues to keep mute concerning his mother`s monstrous attitude.

So many marriages have ended within a short period of exchanging marital vows due to the mother-in-laws inability to limit their interference in the children’s marriage. This has made their daughter in-laws see them as a “monster-in-law” instead of a mother-in law.

Below are steps on how to deal with a “monster- in -law” in the name of a mother-in-law.

Tell Your Spouse to Set Boundaries

Setting boundaries in relationships are very important. Both parents should have their bounds and not wholly interfere in the affairs of their married children except it is highly essential/ their attention is needed.

Sometimes an unscheduled visits by parents/relatives of either spouses may be allowed. However, it is important to set the boundaries to prevent this from being an everyday occurrence.

Good Cop and Bad Cop

The perception you create about your spouse determines how your family/relatives will perceive him/her. Never talk down about your spouse whether to your mother or siblings. It indirectly creates an impression and affects the relationship between them. Irrespective of the character, attitude, issues and differences you may be going through, portray your spouse in a good way, it ensure they get along very well. However, there are cases where the family intervention will be needed, you would need to apply discretion and deal with this in a matured way. 

Appreciate Their Advice Whether You Heed To It or Not

When your mother-in-law offers unsolicited advice either you are interested or not, Ensure you listen attentively, acknowledge that she’s your mother-in-law and thus she is well experienced. Do not in anyway show that you are the tiniest bit disinterested in whatever she says. After the conversation, thank her, let her know that you would make sure to apply the pieces of advice. As a matured married lady who wants to sustain her home, you should be able to sieve through messages, select those which is best applicable and will work for your home then discard the rest. If you go the route of challenging your mother-in-law and showing that you care less about what she says you would be on a journey of creating a rift between you both.

Avoid Escalating Conflict

Visualize scenarios which gets you irritated when your in laws are around come up with a solution before having physical contact with them. In all you do, try avoid those scenarios so as to prevent conflict. Whenever conflicts arise try talk it out with your mother-in-law and respond honestly. Avoid being rude, be firm and polite.

Get Friendly

This comes up when you are left alone with your in law in the house, once you feel the atmosphere is becoming awkward try come up with chit chats, gists and warm up to your in-laws, this will make her know you both can have a cordial relationship.

Recognize Progress When You See It

No one is perfect, always remember your mother-in-law is a human with faults. It is at times difficult for a parent to bond with her new son-or daughter-in-law. They sometime see as if they are being replaced. As soon as you notice progress in your relationship with your mother –in-law make sure you embrace it.

Try Understand Common Problems Between You And Your Mother-In-Law

Are you tired of having a strained relationship with your mother-in-law? It is safe to notice the common problems , scenarios and situations that cause conflicts between you both, try to avoid them and create an atmosphere conducive to enable that you get along.

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While Apart, Do things Together

Here is where you have to find out what the other person loves. Hence, it becomes interesting doing them together; play games, listen to interesting political or entertainment news, watch TV shows, do video calls, buy each other gifts etc. In fact, you both should do fun things together and ensure it is creative and new every day.

Make Recommendations

Share experiences and have things in common to talk about, make recommendations to the other party about books you have read in the past, your favourite TV shows, movies, news and so on. When you do these, the feelings get heightened and you begin to have a mindset towards the same things.

Visit Each Other 

Visits are usually the best parts of a long distance relationship because it will give room for a face to face conversation, and allow you to truly feel how much you have missed the other party. Schedule time to pay each other a visit. Surprise visits won’t also be a bad idea when every form of communication is active.

Have an End Goal in Mind and Work Towards it

What do you both want to achieve at the end of the day?How long are you both going to be apart? What are the plans you are both making for your future? These are the questions you two need to ask yourselves. Truth be told, no couple can be apart forever. Eventually, we all need to settle down. Hence, make a plan with each other. Draw up a timeline, marking down the estimated times apart and times together, and draw an end goal. It is important that you two are on the same page and have the same goals. So that even if you are not living in the same space and the same timezone, both of you are still working together in the same direction, towards similar future with the same goal in mind.

Enjoy Time With Friends and Family

You are alone but you are not lonely. Unless you choose to feel like it. You don’t have to let your world revolve around your partner — you still have you, your friends and your family. Take this time apart to do more with your friends and family. Go to the gym more often. Get a new hobby. Practice a new sport. There are plenty of things to do that necessarily do not involve your partner.

We would bring you the last tips on how to enjoy your long distance relationship in our next write up. Until then, keep the comments coming!

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I was so worried. I feared something bad must have happened to Uncle K. As I walked down the stairs trying to rap my head around what had happened to me during the night; the blood stains and aches  all over my body didn’t just happen overnight. I needed explanation to all of these.

The thought that something bad must have happened to Uncle K kept rushing through my mind as I checked through all the nooks and crannies of the house in search of him but I couldn’t find him. My worries heightened.

Suddenly I heard a sound coming from the boys quarter and so I decided to look around. Uncle K was seated by the bar in the boys quarter which used to be his favourite spot but that changed after my parents’ death.

“Omolola my little wife, you are awake. I can see you have had your bath”. He said to me in a drunken state, I was surprised seeing him that way, it had been a long time I saw him drink so much.

“Uncle K can I ask you a question” I asked.

“What will you like to know?” He asked smiling sheepishly as he gulped down a glass of red wine. “I noticed some strange things when I woke up” I told him, expecting some surprise from him. Shockingly, he wasn’t. Instead, he concentrated on his red wine. Not minding his reaction, I continued with my observation letting him know that I woke up few minutes ago with pains all over my lower region and I also found blood stains on the bed sheets and on my body. Then I asked out-rightly, “Uncle K, do you have any idea of what must have happened to me?”

Uncle K gave a wicked grin, he stood up and walked up to me  standing right in front of me “Do you mean you do not know what happened?” I was dumb founded hearing him say that. “I will give you an insight of how the night was spent”.

‘’You know as a result of the cola I gave you, you became so weak, helpless, and beautiful. I realized it was time for us to play the daddy and mummy kind of game. As I looked into your beaming eyes I couldn’t resist kissing you, I enjoyed the way I had a nice ride on you. The blood you saw on the bed sheet is as a result of the sweet ride we had last night”.

For few minutes I was dumb founded. Did Uncle K just admit to raping me? The fact that he raped me, O my God! my uncle raped me! my own blood took my innocence away from me! Tears started rolling down my eyes, it felt like a running tap that wouldn’t stop.

I expected an apology from him. I wished he could blame it on the alcohol, but no he did not. I thought I had seen the worst of it when I lost my parents. I never knew my life had just turned a disaster.

“You are now a woman and should in case you are trying to remember how this happened, you won’t be able to pin point it, cos the cola i gave you was drugged”.  I started to tremble, I couldn’t fathom it.

My own Uncle did this to me!!

Uncle K didn’t mind. He didn’t care that what he did meant something to me. He destroyed my pride! My innocence!

I couldn’t help but watch him stagger to find his way into the bedroom.

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You do not have to break the bank to purchase these skin care products before you have a flawless skin. A good skin care routine will help you achieve that flawless skin you so desire. Before you develop a skin care routine you have to know your skin type.

Demi Moore an American actress and model once said “I’m a big believer in that if you focus on good skin care, you really won’t need a lot of makeup”.

Listed below are types of skin which I believe will be helpful:

Normal skin

A normal skin is said to be neither tight nor oily, it display a smooth texture and a clear surface.

Dry skin

Dry skin feels tight and flaky especially during the harmattan season and this is as a result of lack of moisture, the skin appears dull this skin type requires serious and close attention.

Oily skin

This type of skin is said to be oily all over, it is shiny and thick. Oily skin is prone to blackheads and other imperfections. It is rampant more in men than in women

Combination skin

This skin type is very common. It is a combination of Oily, normal and dry skin. It could be dryness on the cheeks, dryness around the eyes while oily around the nose, forehead and chin.

When an irritation is seen on a skin maybe as a result of redness, itching, burning or dryness to the application of skin care products. The skin is said to be sensitive.

All skin types have a specific skin care routine, a visit to a dermatologist will help you know your skin type.

How to Have a Flawless Skin

You Are What You Eat

If you desire a flawless skin, you need to cultivate a healthy eating habit. Eating clean should be utmost priority that means eating more fruits, eating vegetables in place of junks. Carbonated water drink and drink more of water. So avoid toxic in your body system.

Have A Skin Care Routine

It is important to know the exact regimen that will work for your skin. I quite understand it might be difficult for one to stick with a routine but I will encourage you to develop one and stick by it. Make sure your routine includes not sleeping at night with your make up, try and clean it up before going to bed. Face cleaners and facial wipes should be part of your skin care product.

Stop The Touchy Act

I know it is quite difficult when we see some imperfections on our face, we tend to always get carried away with playing with pimples or black heads. When we do this, our face get infected with our dirty hands at the same time we spread the substance from the burst pimples to other parts of the face, leading to more pimples. My advice is do not touch stick to your skin care routine.

The No Heavy Sun Therapy

We can all agree that a little vitamin D from the sun does the body some good. I mean you are not a vampire who does not love to stay under the sun so I will advise you invest in some sunglasses and sun hat to prevent the sun from drying up the moisture on your face.

Manage Your Stress Level

Practicing stress management techniques is also important to your skin. After a hard day’s job, try inculcate a stress management technique that will help calm your nerves. Your psychological balance is very important hence it is necessary for you to engage in activities such as sports, listening to music and meditation.

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It is important to state that the help (or a maid) is also a person with her own expectations, values and behaviour. As much as you seek the relief she can bring, you must be ready for the baggage that comes with having an outsider in your home. These are the basic things you need to do in the bid to get a help:

1.  Have A Checklist:

You need to know what you want. Source for this help the way you would employ new workers in your office. The maid is expected to render services in exchange for payment. You need to ask questions relating to work history i.e. has she worked with children? Can she take care of sick people? Why did she leave the last place of employment? These questions will help you screen the available options until you get the right person for the job.

2. Run Background Checks:

So you finally found one that fits your picture of a proper maid. You are happy it is over but is it really that simple? Before you take her into your home, you need to know her. Who is she? Where is her family? Who is she accountable to? Where has she worked and why did she leave there? If these questions have no clear answers, you need to cut your losses and keep searching.

3. Run Medical Tests:

The way you would be concerned about an employee’s state of health is the way you should also deal with the help. This person will live in your house and handle your things and children. It is essential that she gets a clean bill of health before she resumes work. Tests that can help tell if she is pregnant or suffering from incurable diseases like HIV/AIDS, Hepatitis A/B etc. must be carried out so you know what you are dealing with. No one has to tell you how important it is to do your due diligence when it comes to health. You can also read more about must-do medical tests for a maid here.

Now to the second phase, here are a few things you need to do after you have got a maid.

1. Be Professional:

You have to start out and stay true to the process in place for a mutually beneficial relationship. You MUST be kind to her. You cannot treat someone badly and expect that person to put in their best. Give her all the tools she needs to make her work easy i.e. give her a room with supplies (Sanitary pad, roll-on etc.). Let her know where her tools are while making room for her to give feedback when she needs to. She is not a slave and she must never feel like one. On the other hand, she is not family so there should not be undue familiarity.

2. State Your Expectations:

As the boss, you need to tell her what she is required to do and break it into bits for her. This way, she knows what to do and how to do it. If she needs to do the laundry and clean the house (amongst other chores), tell her clearly while putting the time frame for this to be done.

3. Install a Camera:

This is your choice but you might want to do this since you are not going to be at home with the help 24/7. You want to be sure that she is doing exactly what should be done. This way, you can keep an eye on her and watch how she treats your children.

4. Buy a Small Phone:

Getting the maid a small phone will help you stay in touch while you are away. This makes it easy to give her instructions via the phone and also speak to the children from time to time. Give her your number so she can reach you in case of an emergency and also load airtime so that she can call you when something urgent comes up. A number of people might feel that the maid will use this for personal use but the pros outweigh the cons and you can always go through the call log and text messages from time to time.

5. Lower Your Expectations:

It can be frustrating to work with someone who has to be told what to do and how to do things but that is life. She is not you and she is not perfect. To avoid issues, you need to consciously give her room to learn from you and also make her mistakes. After a few months, you can be sure that she will be better at it though she can never be perfect.

6. Ask Questions:

If you notice anything out of place, do not guess. Ask her direct questions and watch out for tell-tale signs of lying. Also speak with your children and get their own side of the story. Remain civil to her no matter the offense. Do not punish your maid by beating or starving her. That is totally unacceptable. If she does not learn after a stipulated time or becomes unruly, let her go. Work on getting another maid and keep your sanity.

These tips do not guarantee a seamless experience with a help. However, you can be sure that you have done your best. If the maid becomes a problem, don’t hesitate to let her go and begin the search again. No one is indispensable so do not be afraid to let her go for stealing or disobedience. There are good maids out there. Some people have gotten good maids who are loyal and become family even to the point of going to school and even getting married. If you have other tips that should be here, kindly share by leaving a comment. Stay well and don’t stop keeping it together.

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