What is the secret glue that holds a marriage together? Love? Sex? Money? Friendship?

Depending on your marital status-single or married, you are likely to finger sex as the answer to the question.

Is sex an intense act of expressing love or a genital meet & greet? Your response may depend on your marital status as unmarried people think all married people do is have sex.

Whether this is right or wrong depends on the parties involved in the relationship. However, sexual relations or simply put, sex in marriage is a major determinant of marital health. An increase, a decrease or a change in the overall experience may help couples gauge their marital temperature correctly.

Don’t think this is not an important part of marriage? think again. Many counsellors and sex therapists spend most of their time identifying reasons for a change in sexual patterns while proferring solutions for couples under pressure to improve in this area. If you are about to be or already married and looking to guess the likely reason for a decrease in coitus, you are in the right place.

Here are five possible reasons why your sex life may not be adding up:

1. Work Stress

The average human spends most of their life working. Your job affects you both positively and negatively. Finding fulfilment in your work makes it easy to see its impact on bedroom matters. Interestingly, it is not easy to draw a straight line from work to a decline in sex within marriage. It is easy to forget how one part of our lives affects the other parts, directly or indirectly. Sex is an act of intimacy that involves both body and soul. Apart from being physically demanding, the quality of sexual relations between a couple depends on their emotional balance as well.

A bad day at work could impact the fulfilment of this marital rite negatively. Focusing on extremely hard work instead of smart work may put you and your partner in an unhealthy sexual position. To curb this, start by reviewing your work pattern. Also, do everything possible to work smart while maintaining a positive mindset during work and at the close of business. Getting home in high spirits will help you put your energy to good use in the bedroom.

2. Bad Nutrition

This is another likely cause of sexual challenges in marriage. The cliche ‘Garbage in, Garbage out‘, helps put this in perspective. A review of how the body interacts with food helps shed light on the role of food in sexual matters. Nutrients such as carbohydrates, vitamins, and minerals among other important elements nourish the body and sharpen the mind. Poor eating habits burden your organs and force your body to extract non-existent energy from your cells.

The body receives signals from the brain when certain nutrients are not available. These signals can make your body strip your cells of important nutrients to keep you going. This action could lead to a nutrition deficit or imbalance which leaves you weaker than you should be. What does this mean for the time spent with your partner during sex? Perhaps a reduction or the need to stop abruptly to recoup lost energy. The impact of this on the quality of sex goes without saying. The logical way out is to take a deeper look at your feeding habits. Does your meal have the right balance of vegetables, fruits and other essential elements? Will it nourish the body and soul? Does your food supply the body with the necessary amount of energy it needs to function? Think about it.

3. Wrong Knowledge

According to research, many people learn about sex by watching and interacting with pornographic materials. Invariably, this would mean either of two things: 1. Many people have the wrong idea of what sex should be like 2. Certain unreal expectations may be attached to this important ingredient for marital bonding. It is possible that pornography may have a few good sides. However, pornography makes it easy to see sex as a selfish act or a means to a highly pleasurable end.

How sex is displayed or described in pornographic videos or reading materials makes this so. It is an open secret that stimulants are used to help the actors in pornographic materials get into character. This makes expecting a similar performance from your partner unrealistic. Therefore, counsellors and sex therapists are in the best position to assist couples who want to explore and enjoy sex.

The next reason sheds more light on this point. Keep reading.

4. Poor Communication

Communication goes beyond talking; it involves the use of verbal and non-verbal cues during the exchange of messages. This means partners are bound to pay attention to what is expressed by their significant other. If a couple is not able to clearly express or interpret pleasure or pain, there could be tension. This might make one party endure or avoid sex every chance they get.

Your partner may not enjoy certain acts during sex. Discuss this while preserving the next person’s dignity. That is one way to initiate the move from bad to enjoyable. Also, consider a session with a sex therapist to gain positive knowledge and a deep understanding of your partner’s needs.

5. Personal Hygiene

The parts of the body involved and the exchange of bodily fluids make sex an extremely sensitive and intimate act. This means the difference between good and bad sexual experiences may be (un)cleanliness. If your partner is constantly looking for a cop-out, you may be giving ‘dirty’ vibes that make your partner uncomfortable.

Here are a few questions to ask yourself. Do I smell nice? Does my breath stink? Maybe my nether region needs grooming? Is my pH balanced? Do I need a bath? Are the bedsheets clean? Does my hair smell damp?

Getting the answers to these questions may be a game-changer.

Male or female, you want to show up for the act of lovemaking in your cleanest and most attractive form. This includes paying attention to every part of your body and your smell. A visit to a health expert (like a gynaecologist) may help you get the nether region in order. Remember that the state of your body and smell impacts how sex plays out. Don’t leave this to chance. Do right by your body and raise the bar of the sexual frequency in your relationship.

Any of the above may be a possible reason for poor sexual pleasure. It is important to understand that there may be bad sex days. Shit happens. Having constant bad days every other day is a major cause of concern. If this has become normal in your relationship, address it so your partner does not seek sexual pleasure elsewhere.

Now you know five likely reasons why your sex life may need a fix. The next article gives practical steps to getting your sex life back on track. Don’t forget to like, share and leave a comment below.

Keep winning!

The post Five Reasons Why Your Sex Life Is Not Adding Up appeared first on Hermaze | Relationship, Beauty, Fashion, Family Articles for Women.

Relationships with a spouse come with unique challenges. Living with your spouse within the confines of marriage is a different kettle of fish. This is expected based on the unending nature of forever. However, contrary to what is widely believed, offences usually come from the little things. These little actions do not look harmful at first until they snowball into major issues and water down the strength of the union. Experienced counsellors are able to advise couples to look out for these little actions that can create a big wedge in no time.

Here are five acts that may be driving your spouse nuts:

1. Staying on the Phone

Living in a digital age means relying on your mobile phone for communication and work-related needs. This also means having a strong presence on social media platforms and apps such as Facebook, WhatsApp and Instagram and more. The addictive nature of these apps translates to endless scrolling and fear of missing out (FOMO). Though a valid move, it affects valuable couple time and breeds resentment. The way forward is to time your phone use and set it aside after the stipulated minutes or hours. Your relationship will be better for it.

2. Not Giving Enough Compliments

Living with another person demands a measure of tact and maturity. Ensuring your spouse feels good and complete around you is a great way to boost their self-esteem. This means looking for every reason to say good things to them. If you believe your spouse should know how you feel about them, you may be making the wrong impression by your inaction. Also, there may be a tendency to compliment strangers because of the outcomes it provides. The world is already tough enough, taking the initiative to say nice things is a great way to set the right tone in your space.

3. Holding Back Affection

You know the golden rule – love your neighbour as yourself. In this case, your neighbour is your spouse, your second half – the one person who is able to see every side of you yet decides to stay in your life. How you treat them is a pointer to how they might treat you. So if you have ever felt the need to keep sealed lips instead of showering your significant other with ‘accolades’ or kind words, you are wrong. Gentle and sincere words of affection give a whole level of high while taking the next person’s self-esteem up by one notch. What happens if your partner senses unkindness or feels slighted? Your guess is as good as mine. It does not augur well. Make it a culture to be openly affectionate towards your spouse. This will in turn cause them to shower you with love.

4. Buying Presents YOU Like

As a child, did you ever have moments of sulking because you had to eat a meal you did not like so much? Remember how that made you feel? Then you should understand why this is a bad idea. While it is important and thoughtful to give your spouse a gift, it is also necessary to review the reason behind your action. Did you give them that particular present because you believed it was specially made for them or was it a gift of convenience? Thoughtfulness as it concerns gifting is tied to how much the recipient of the gift will like it. So before you consider getting a present for the one you love, find out if it is a gift they would love and appreciate. Think about it!

5. Putting the Children First

Children are a gift to their parents. However, the tendency to make them the centre of your world at your spouse’s expense looms. While it is important to show your children undiluted love and affection, the ability to balance this alongside catering to your significant other’s needs remains paramount. Starving your partner can drive a wedge between you and them while rubbing off on the children negatively.
An easy way to ensure this does not happen includes spending focused time away from the little ones. Weekly date nights in a warm, romantic setting are a great option for bonding and enjoying each other’s company.

There you have it, five habits that make your spouse unhappy. Which of these caught you by surprise?
Do share by leaving a comment.

Now that you know how your behaviour may be affecting your marriage, how about moving things around to make your union more fun?

Remember to like, share and look out for the next article.

The post Five Seemingly Harmless Actions Driving Your Spouse Crazy appeared first on Hermaze | Relationship, Beauty, Fashion, Family Articles for Women.

February is the month of love. However, every day is another opportunity to love yourself better. Considering how much attention Valentine’s Day gets every year, you are about to find out how to deliberately love yourself.

1. Affirm Yourself

The mistake many people make is constantly waiting for love and affection from somebody else. In the event that there is no lover to do this for you, filling that void on your own is the best way to go. All it takes is standing in front of a mirror and speaking good words aloud. This helps boost your self-esteem while giving you the chance to see yourself as a total human worthy of love and validation.

2. Splurge on Yourself

Saving is a great way to plan for your future. However, there are moments you need to treat yourself nicely. Outsourcing personal enjoyment to other parties may leave you feeling resentful. There are moments you need to go above and beyond for yourself. Identify such moments and draw up a plan to show yourself love on a budget. Easy activities such as eating out, buying a special gift on a day of your choice and changing an item that has served you for a long time remain options to try out. Do this and watch your soul thank you.

3. Celebrate Loved Ones

There is more to love and affection than romantic relationships. In a world where there is always so much to do, it is easy to focus on finding a significant other and forget your family and friends. The family and friends you have gotten from childhood remain an important part of your life. These are people who knew and loved you when there was no real reason to. They bring a special balance to your world whether it is obvious or not. By calling, texting or paying a visit to these awesome people, you nurture these lifelong relationships and attract unconditional love that makes you feel whole and well. The good feeling of seeing them enjoy your attention will make you smile. Try this out today!

4. Move Your Body

In this digital age, the sedentary lifestyle remains a constant. From scrolling through different timelines to staring at laptop screens, it takes conscious efforts to get movement-induced dopamine today. Studies have shown that the key to a healthy lifestyle is intentional movements. This is why you should treat yourself to physical activities such as dance, yoga and cardio at least 2-3 times a week. This impacts your mind, body and soul in ways that only years can reveal. Add this to your weekly routine and get the chance to feel like a brand-new you always.

5. Lean Into Nature

Staring at the wall, screens and busy roads from the window remains the norm in this fast-paced world. These and many other indoor habits have the tendency to leave you mentally tired and drained. This does not only impact the body, it also affects the mind. According to science, experiencing nature in form of green scenery, the sea and sunlight improves dopamine and vitamin D levels positively. This does not only help you relax as a person, but it also gives you the boost needed to focus on and complete daily tasks. Also, the occasional silence and gentle sounds associated with nature can help you meditate while calming the noise in your head. Nature speaks if you open your heart. Show yourself intense love and calm your frayed nerves by exploring the great outdoors today.

There you have it! Five easy ways to love yourself fiercely. Stop waiting for others to show you love. You have one life to live. Enjoy it by showing yourself love every single day. Happy Valentine’s Day!

The post Five Ways to Love Yourself Better As a Single appeared first on Hermaze | Relationship, Beauty, Fashion, Family Articles for Women.

Sharing your life with your partner – the one you love – goes beyond having happy moments. Life is unpredictable and with each day comes the possibility of facing low moments when it is least expected. This means no matter how good you and your partner may be to each other, challenging situations such as loss or disappointments from trusted persons may appear. While it is impossible to avoid these down moments, knowing what to do can turn bad moments into bonding opportunities.

Here are four ways to support your partner when their smile suddenly becomes a frown:

Grant a Rant Pass

From heated arguments with their colleague at work to road accidents or a toothache, there are many valid reasons why your partner may feel the need to lash out at the air from pain or disappointments. This is your time to step back and give them room to pour out their anguish in words or in actions without making it out as an attack on your person.

A rant pass is not a physical item, it is a mental and emotional state of mind that offers safety. Your partner may let out expletives that will make the hair on your neck stand or yell when angry or disappointed, allow them. Step out of their space and give them room to do what makes them calm down. If they need a listening ear, go ahead and be their peace by offering your ears without judgement. They will come around and thank you for it.

Get Them Comfort Food

In a relationship, there will always be room to offer support in cash and kind. Knowing what works and presenting it with plenty of love and affection goes a long way. For downtimes when your partner slips into moments of despair, giving them food or snacks is a reasonable option to embrace. Some meals are known to be comfort meals because of their impact on dopamine and adrenaline levels. Such foods may be gotten from a restaurant or even whipped up at home in no time. However, what really counts is the thought of offering them something to eat when they least expect it, especially at a time that naturally makes it the last option. Try it and watch that frown turn into a smile in no time.

Give a Quick Massage

Wisdom and selflessness are two elements you must embody and lavish on your partner. In moments when your partner feels like all hope is lost or the world has come to an end, the gift of touch may be all they need to get over their feelings and move on to bigger things. If your partner is big on touch, that moment of despair offers you room to massage their body gently. This calms frayed nerves and helps them relax while giving you something productive to do. Focus on their back, feet and temple to turn that cranky partner into a sleeping baby. It works.

Offer Words of Advice

Depending on the kind of partner you have, it is important to know how to handle rants and meltdowns. While some persons prefer to be left alone to sulk or cry, some persons prefer to share their problems with trusted friends and come up with a solution. If your partner is all for solutions, hearing them speak about their challenge while listening and pondering on likely resolutions may just be the best approach to consider. All you have to do is locate a comfortable spot in the house or a quiet place and sit. Look your partner in the eye and smile as they pour out their minds in the way they can. Ask if they would rather have you respond while they speak or share your thoughts only after they are done.

This gives them a measure of safety while encouraging them to be as vulnerable as possible with you. At the same time, it makes your partner know you have got their back anytime they need a shoulder to lean on. Listening and offering likely solutions is a valuable way to show love in difficult times.

Think about it.

Bonus: Give Them Space

While all the aforementioned points focus on spending time with the partner in distress, knowing when to get out of their hair is a bonus. Based on experience and relationship, you should know your partner and what would work for them per time. While it is good to be present, stepping back may also be an effective way to help your partner cope with their challenges.

After doing all you can to physically calm them, you may need to excuse them so they are able to work out their distress alone. This would serve as me-time for them while giving them room to think or talk without interference.

Try out one or all of the five tips in this article and watch your partner appreciate you in ways words cannot describe. Have a productive week!

The post Four Thoughtful Ways to Help a Partner in Distress appeared first on Hermaze | Relationship, Beauty, Fashion, Family Articles for Women.

Distance should not be the reason for a breakdown in connection. In recent times, changing location for the purpose of education, job opportunities, personal improvement and family goals has become the norm. Despite these valid reasons, moving to a different continent brings unique challenges including keeping one away from one’s partner and family members.

While the effects may come in different forms and distance, it is important to find ways around this uncomfortable but necessary challenge associated with change.

In this article, you will discover four ways to keep your relationship going albeit from a distance. Ready? Let’s dive in!

Share Moments

One of the downsides of living in different time zones is the challenge of calling or discussing in real time. However, with social media apps such as WhatsApp, there is no distance that cannot be bridged. Sharing pictures with little notes about every event as it happens or every other hour will definitely keep the conversation going. This also keeps you and your partner at the top of your mind around the clock. In addition, videos may be added to this to remind the recipient about your mannerisms. This will make them miss you while giving you the chance to pour out your heart to your soulmate 24/7.

Talk More

Improving the quality of intimacy from a distance requires creativity. The good thing is there is endless access to your partner if you make use of the tools within your reach. From WhatsApp to Microsoft Teams to Slack to Google Meet, there are options that do not attract high charges, thanks to wifi and mobile data. Leaving a video of you wishing your partner a good day or saying a prayer will go a long way. What is even better is exchanging your prayer or good wishes for the day in person with a smile on your face. With these tools, you also get to schedule a fixed time for daily or bi-hourly calls if you wish. Staying in touch will always trump making excuses. Give your partner the gift of joy and happiness from a distance, talk more!

Share Updates

This is a super important move especially if you have children. One of the challenges of living apart is the possibility of missing important events and milestones. From missing your child’s first steps to not being part of their birthdays, distance has a way of making you feel guilty. Before you begin to feel bad, cast your mind back to why you are not physically together and find comfort. Also, make it a point of duty to ask about particular events you hold dear to your heart so your partner can fill in the blanks for you.

This not only strengthens your bond but also provides more topics for conversation. This can be done via emails or google docs depending on what works for both of you. In addition, your chats can serve as a communication channel with multimedia files where possible. The highlight may be having the children say hello when there is room to do that. Weekdays or weekends work, as long as it is convenient for everyone.

Plan Together

Distance does not stop your family goals from finding expression. In fact, it should serve as a foundation for keeping the love embers aflame while keeping you and your spouse on the same page. Typically, couples tend to set mutually-dependent goals every other month. If you do, these targets should not go cold because of distance. Thanks to tools like Google sheet and drive, it is possible to make a neat list of these agreed goals with standard timelines, action points and key resources.

With this virtual plan, you and your partner can hold each other accountable and provide updates from time to time. Think of it as a virtual plan to help you two make progress regardless of distance. Think about it.

If you were worrying about what your relationship would become because of distance, you have four simple tips to make it better than ever. Do you have any other tip you would like to add based on your experience? Kindly share in the comment section. The next article will take your relationship to a whole new level. Don’t miss it!

The post 4 Ways to Have a Great Long Distance Relationship appeared first on Hermaze | Relationship, Beauty, Fashion, Family Articles for Women.

Before you go on, let’s take a look at the big picture – counselling as an eye-opening tool for couple improvement, not a grim setting where someone talks over you and your partner’s head.

One of the most talked about life topics is marriage. Marriage often happens when two individuals like each other and intend to take the bold step to become an official couple. Considering the excitement of doing life with the one you love, it might be easy to think of the big wedding only. This is where counselling comes in.

For many people, having an eye on the big event may trump the substance of marriage. Considering the rate of divorce in recent times, understanding this thing called marriage with the help of experienced counsellors makes sense.

In this article, you will discover why pre-marital counselling should be in the cards for you and your soon-to-be partner.

Here are four reasons why you need to visit a counsellor with your lover before signing the dotted lines:

To Improve Anticipation

Saying ‘I love you’ to each other every minute of the day is not all there is to living with your lover for the rest of your life. There is a measure of tolerance, patience and understanding needed to make a success of your approaching marriage. Sitting with seasoned counsellors who have navigated the same terrain for many years will put the journey in perspective while equipping you and your significant other with key soft skills and conflict-resolution tools for the days ahead. Yet to consider it? Try it out today!

To Resolve Differences

The illusion that love is enough remains the reason why many relationships crumble under the slightest pressure. Having two people from different backgrounds in the same boat comes with unique challenges. These are people with unique outlooks on life. Thoughts on money, family and career can cause division if not discussed ahead of time. The best time to agree on such sensitive subjects is before. Hence, pre-marital counselling gives couples room to see weighty topics through the eyes of the next person and meet each other halfway before the journey begins.

To Foster Communication

Becoming one with someone you have fallen in love with is one thing. Staying in love with them in a long-term game that involves constant verbal and non-verbal exchange is another. This is where counselling comes in. Considering the unexpected twists and turns that are bound to show up on this lifelong journey and its impact on one’s health, understanding how the partner thinks and interprets every form of communication is important. With the input of the trained third party, thinking patterns are bound to come to the fore. This helps the couples know how to address each other respectfully, leaving the couple better than ever. Alternatively, some couples go through counselling and agree that they have no business taking the big step because of unique differences. Either way, it leaves both parties better than before. And in the long run, that is a good thing.

To Identify Patterns

Psychologists say there is usually a strong tendency to play out the familiar. What this means is that each person is bound to rely on their personal or learned experience in a particular terrain. For many people, watching their parents or older relatives in marriage creates their idea of what an ideal marriage should be. This is in spite of despising certain parts of the same. Over time, these examples embed themselves in our subconscious where the line between right and wrong may be blurred due to respect or repetition. This explains why many people get married and have certain ‘unspoken’ expectations of their partner.

During counselling, some exercises are carried out. This reveals hidden expectations and each person’s mindset ahead of time. There is also the likelihood of unresolved childhood traumas coming to light. These are events that have happened in a person’s childhood that have not been adequately processed and addressed. Leaving it unattended poses a threat to the success and longevity of the union in view. Fortunately, the potential stings in these issues can go away if both parties are open to resolving them during the sessions.

These are reasons why you should explore premarital counselling before the big day. Have you gone for counselling or know someone who has? Please share your experience by leaving a comment below.

Look out for the next article!

The post Marriage Counselling: 4 Reasons to Explore It appeared first on Hermaze | Relationship, Beauty, Fashion, Family Articles for Women.

Every year, the month of November offers a chance to celebrate the men in our lives. From words of affirmation to items that show appreciation for how much love the men we celebrate have shown us, there are many ideas to try out this season. Getting a gift and creating a life-changing experience should rank high on your to-do list for international men’s day. 

By the end of this article, we will know what to do differently and figure out how to create memories for the men without leaving that bank account in the red.  

Here are five gift options for the man you love:

1. Think Fragrances

A solid way to stand out from the crowd is to smell great. This means you can never go wrong with perfumes. Perfumes come in different shapes, types and forms. There are many fragrance types to make this happen. With many affordable to pricey options to choose from, you are on your way to making that man smile and boosting his ego around the clock. 

2. Consider Meals

The saying “the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach” comes to mind. Getting into the kitchen feels like a chore for many people, no man is too serious to push food aside. Platters do the trick. All it takes is planning and booking a chef at a pocket-friendly cost and the day (or week) is made for that man. Yes, it is that simple! 

3. Accessories Anyone?

Being mobile offers convenience. It is a chance to showcase identity. From mobile phones to cars and PlayStation consoles, men love their toys. Transform his space or toy for a lasting smile. Find out what he has and buy complementary accessories for one or all. 

4. Opt for Outfits

As the adage goes, looking good is good business. Power dressing has come to stay in this century and men are not playing in this department. Again, this is why men’s clothing remains a gift that will never go out of fashion (pun intended). From shirts to suits and native attires, there is a long list of exciting fashion items to gift that special man. 

5. Try Fitness 

Health is important for the forward-thinking man. In the spirit of men’s month, gifting him along these lines is definitely a good idea. There are options like therapy time, physical fitness membership and networking conferences to pick from. These are affordable yet thoughtful gifts to keep his stress levels down and make him a star at work. 

Now you can do something for the men in your life and make them smile like the bird that swallowed the canary. Share this article with friends and look out for the next one. Have a great week!  

The post For the Men You Love appeared first on Hermaze | Relationship, Beauty, Fashion, Family Articles for Women.

Here are 9 additions that can transform your bedroom into an Island of adventures

Dimmable Lights

Hear me out before you say “Duh!!!” Lights have a way of casting a glow on everything. You can choose to light things up or tone it down. These lights are a combination of both as you have the liberty to make the lights do your bidding at the flicker of a button. Hence, when you need to really see what you are doing, you can make the light become brighter and when it is time for nocturnal activities to take place-yeah you guessed right-just tone it down. Dimmable lights can be controlled from the side of your bed which eliminates the need to disrupt activities by getting up. Your partner would love this one!

Scented Candles

The ambience of a place can be manipulated by the kind of fragrance released into the atmosphere. If you like the idea of giving the room a particular look and feel while inhaling something heavenly, these candles are your best bet. With beautiful candle holders set in strategic corners of the room, you are definitely going to bond with your partner and sleep like a baby.

Diffusers & Potpourri

Setting up your room for a romantic moment should not be something that happens in a stale smelling room. Diffusers and/or potpourris will get rid of that stuffy smell and give you the perfect ambience needed for a “me and my boo” setting. Diffusers are those little jars that have bamboo skewers sticking out of them. The skewers release the perfume into the atmosphere in a subtle manner. Potpourris, on the other hand, are little bowls of dried flowers that have been soaked in fragrance for so long hence the unquenchable scent it gives. You can use either of these or both based on your preference.

The Love-seat

Additional furniture in the bedroom can come in handy at different times. Apart from sitting on it to read, think or do romantic stuff, a love-seat adds an aesthetic quality to your bedroom as it can be used to add a pop of colour without doing too much. This can be selected based on space restraints and taste.

Fluffy Sheets

Imagine a bed with the right kind of sheets and additional beddings that makes you want to sleep all day. This is what dreams are made of. Bed sheets, duvets, bed skirts made from the finest and softest materials will make you climb in any minute of the day and the sleep will have you flying in your dreams. Girl, insomnia has nothing on you with this one.

Plush Pillows

Having picture perfect beds should not be a dream, make the dreams come true without spending too much money. Pillows are nice accessories that can be a part of the décor and also support your neck whenever you want. Throw pillows and sleeping pillows can be bought or made and arranged on your bed at will. The softer and more padded they are, the better for you.

Bed Frame(s)

This does not only refer to the lower part that sets your bed on or above the floor, it also covers the upper part that extends towards the ceiling. Apart from holding up additional accessories like bed curtains or mosquito nets, it is a structure that creates the illusion of an enclosure within your bedroom. The fact that it comes in both wooden and metal designs gives you the option of buying or getting yours custom made by your furniture maker. Throw on bed curtains and feel your bedroom come alive when you let down the drapes for private moments. Your bedroom will bubble with life whenever you decide to let it fall. Let’s not forget the part of having some time to recoup when your children barge into the room without prior notice.

A Solid Headboard

A bed does not only look like its frame, it looks and feels better with a stylish headboard. You don’t only have something to lean your pillow on, you also have something to grab onto when the heat is on. This beauty can be designed together with your bed frame or separately and you can make one yourself if you need to add a personal touch. Google is your best friend in the DIY department.

Mirrors

Made from glass and metal for an easy on the eye look, this intricate work of art frames our walls and doubles as props for makeup and pictures. Another thing to take into consideration is the way it reflects light without doing too much. Get one or more for that nice touch.

Now you have a better reason to shut down your computer at the close of business and find your way home. Don’t forget that these accessories will make your partner rate you a 10/10 in the bedroom department aesthetically or otherwise. Why not give it a try?  You are welcome!

The post 9 Bedroom Accessories That Will Ensure You Have a Good Night Rest appeared first on Hermaze | Relationship, Beauty, Fashion, Family Articles for Women.

Here are 5 things that you should not do or allow anyone to do to your baby

Touching Baby with Unwashed Hands

A lot of mothers leave the hospital a few days after delivery without taking the immunization that would boost baby’s health status and protect them from infections. They may be asked to return later that week to receive this vaccine. This simply means that extra care must be taken pending the time this baby will receive it. Consequently, whenever you have a reason to visit new mothers, you may want to be proactive enough to ask for the tap so you can wash your hands with soap and water. If you are sweating, it is much better to wave at the baby instead of carrying her with a sweaty body. As a mother, you must always wash your hands before handling your baby and you may have to be firm enough to direct everyone to the tap so that they wash their hands as well to avoid stories that touch.

Covering Baby’s Face with Kisses

Love for babies could get you overly excited and the temptation to cover the baby with kisses should not be allowed to find expression. This is due to the health risks involved. There is the story of a baby that had to be admitted to the hospital after she was diagnosed with Herpes. Further investigations revealed that the kisses of the mother’s friend who had herpes exposed this baby to the same virus which became her reality in no time. Babies are very fragile and should be treated carefully. If you or your friends have cold or other ailments, you must exercise caution and avoid facial skin contact with the little one.

Throwing Baby Up and Around

Africans are very physical people and they don’t hesitate to handle a baby physically. Unfortunately, this act of life can be the beginning of a life of avoidable misery. One of the greatest mistakes anyone can make in this age and time is to throw a young baby up repeatedly or carry the baby and shake the baby to the point that their head bobs back and forth. This action can be detrimental to the baby as the brain is still very fragile and has the capacity to move back and forth with every shake thereby leading to brain damage. Studies have shown that this is not a myth or the figment of anybody’s imagination and anyone who has a baby must be careful enough to let people know that such an act is not welcome.

Administering Herbal Concoction

This is a practice that comes up when superstitions are big issues in a family. Many elderly women have a way of looking at a baby and concluding that she has an ailment due to her shape of the head or the size of her body. Most times, these old wives are quick to offer herbal concoctions as the easy way out of this seemingly worrisome predicament. Out of fear and respect, many mothers listen to these old wives’ tales and end up compromising the health of the said child or losing same to death. The only way to get the best form of care for your child is to consult with a trained medical practitioner. If you have love for your little one, you will not give them herbs. In the case of an anomaly, resist any form of self-medication and speak with a certified doctor who will run tests and administer the required medication.

Force-feeding the Little One

When it comes to feeding, many people are passionate about ensuring that the baby eats well. However, on occasions where the baby seems to be uninterested in eating, many people go out of their way to force the baby to feed. This is usually done by locking one’s legs around the child, pinning him down, pinching his nose which would have him open the mouth to breathe. As the mouth becomes open, the food is forced into the mouth. The intention may be good but the downside of this method is the possibility of cutting off the oxygen supply or having the child struggle until the food goes the wrong way. This act has cut short many lives and left many families in pain.

Ignorance is no longer an excuse to expose your angel to danger. Love your little one and care for them so that your future will be a peaceful one. Now that you know, do better and watch tomorrow reward you for your love and care.

The post Baby Care: 5 Things Nobody Should Do to a Baby appeared first on Hermaze | Relationship, Beauty, Fashion, Family Articles for Women.

This year’s Valentine’s Day may just be the perfect dream of anyone who seeks to save cash and hang out alone or with friends. Not only is it a weekday, it is also Ash Wednesday (Catholic faithfuls know that this is an important day for Lent) and it is a day for Football lovers as Champion League unleashes Real Madrid Vs PSG. Many people will spend this day alone as declaring love will not be tied to a significant other. This year’s Valentine’s Day will be the perfect chance for football fans to declare their love for their favourite clubs.

If you are not a football lover or a Catholic, you may want to avoid feeling bad when leboo decides to go to the viewing centre or have friends over at his place. It goes without saying that a lot of babes will spend this day away from the mushy setting Feb 14 is known for. The good part is this; you don’t need anyone to show you love when you have got yourself covered. Whether you plan to celebrate love on Valentine’s Day or push the celebration to the weekend, this article is going to show you how to have great fun without breaking the bank or missing that special guy.

Here are 4 solid ways to pamper yourself this Valentine’s Day.

Go to the Spa

Many ladies feel that it costs a fortune to get the glow they long for. With as little as 10k, you can give your skin a new look by getting a full body scrub. This will not only help relieve the stress of the week, it will also give you the feel of relaxation that comes with spoiling yourself while taking off the dead cells on the surface of your skin. If you have some more cash to spare, you can throw in a full body massage and feel each rub remove tension in a way that will make you smile. You can make it a fun experience by making it an all-girls party. Just get all your friends to sign up for the spa experience and go for a drink afterwards. Try it this Valentine’s Day/weekend and feel your body thank you.

Visit the Mall

It is no hidden fact that the end of the holidays has eliminated the possibility of going on a road trip with friends and loved one but this is a different way to have a good time. A trip to the mall does not have to depend on how much free time you have got on your hands. All you need do is meet with your friends at a venue and call an Uber or Taxify cab to take you to the mall. There are different interesting spots to trade gist, grab a bite and window shop without getting bored. Window shopping is a great way to remind yourself of the beauty of making more money. You can also end the mall trip on a good note by seeing a movie together. That way, you get to laugh, cry and analyze the movie as a group. Just make a pick and move around to enjoy yourself this Valentine’s Day.

Go to the Beach

Water has a refreshing effect on everyone (and no, we are not talking about chilled water in a bottle). The beach is the place to enjoy the warmth of Mother Nature in form of the beautiful sun, taste of salt and the cool breeze that leaves you smiling. One place to visit this season is the serene Leisure Lake at Lekki. It does not cost much to get in (about 1500 or so) and there are a lot of edibles to choose from. You also get to move on water by cruising on the boat or trying your hands at Jet Skiing. There are other fun activities to choose from which will leave your adrenaline pumping while blessing your camera with cool pictures. Choose a date and have all the fun the beach has to offer alone or with your friends.

Stop at a Karaoke Bar

This activity is for the songbirds and their fans. If you love a challenge and have a soft spot for singing, you might want to try this with your goons. The ambience of a karaoke bar is dark and cosy enough to add a spark to your evening. Add a few drinks and suya or food to the mix and see the atmosphere light up for you and your friends. This activity is perfect for Valentine’s Day because night time is synonymous with karaoke. All you have to do is make provision for a sleepover so all the girls can get up the next morning and leave for work. You can also have a dress code and exchange gifts with the girls to make it a perfect night of love.

Now go on, have great fun and create sweets memories on and off camera with your goons this Valentine’s Day.

The post The February 14 Issue-Four Fun Activities to Make This Valentine’s Day Special appeared first on Hermaze | Relationship, Beauty, Fashion, Family Articles for Women.