Essence Of Keeping Your Relationship Away From The Public-The Why, How And Whatnot

The beauty of a relationship is in its packaging. Some think a good thing should be kept sacred- away from roaming eyes while others assume it should be announced and displayed for all to see. A number of people (including celebrities) have successfully shielded their adorable family from the media. Unfortunately, most people who put their family secrets out on the internet had to lick their wounds alone when things got out of hands (news of domestic violence drama, husband snatching chronicles and even separation or divorce leave marks that take a while to heal). There is so much to learn from both the “keepers” and the “sharers”.

A few weeks back, the surprising news of Banky W and Adesua Etomi’s engagement virtually broke the internet. It was shocking because these two are celebrities who have been favoured and loved by the public. The first reaction was the possibility of a planned publicity stunt for the sequel to the movie in which they were both featured- The Wedding Party which the public just heard about. But the facts quickly had us believing that this was no joke. These two finally made their well-protected relationship of about two years or less public. Reason: The weekend after the announcement was their family introduction and they felt it was the perfect time to tell the world what to expect. (At least, they told the world before the introduction, people like Di’Ja the singer did not say a word about her relationship until wedding pictures surfaced on the internet months after the ceremony). The well circulated pictures of a full room and shoulder-leaning finally removed the scales from the eyes of the doubting Thomases. Why and how did they manage to keep this juicy part of their collective lives away from the paparazzi? In all fairness, did the secrecy- shielding their love life help the success of the relationship? Find out our take in the next few lines:

THE WHY

For Privacy Sake:

Life is already hard for celebrities who have to deal with the paparazzi putting their private moments (including their restroom tales and other super private events) on the internet and in the dailies for the world to read. A relationship is hard work so allowing it be served like hot food before the ever curious public will not only create undue attention; it will also leave the burden of having to explain why it failed (God forbid but relationships may fail) and that is not a funny experience. There is the part of unnecessary comments and side talks to consider as well (people like to talk). Protecting your relationship from public glare will keep you going while helping you and your partner weather relationship storms. To avoid stories that touch, privacy is key!

THE HOW

No PDA

It is a known fact that the ever-present love fever can come upon lovers or partners in public. Please remember to keep it discreet. The world does not have to see heavy pettings and groping in public. It leaves a bad taste in everyone’s mouth and makes it look like there is no self-control in the equation. Keep it under the wraps and don’t do anything that will raise eyebrows in the public space. Save it for your house.

No Unnecessary Posting on Social Media

This is something we all need to work on. Since the frenzy of the social media  started, caution has been thrown to the wind. Remember the way people protected their diaries and used codes to write down memories and events, the reverse is the case now. People put up pictures with captions that arouse interest and get upset when our so-called friends forget to like, react and share like it is a crime. Treasures are cherished because they are well-kept and displayed with wisdom. A young lady who is only a girlfriend thinks she needs to massage her lover’s ego by putting up a picture where she is kissing him. Sorry to burst your bubble girlfriend, he can decide to break up with you the next day. Now think about how you have to spend precious time deleting such pictures or how you have to explain to everyone that the relationship did not stand the test of time. You also get the bonus of starting the crying session afresh for every time you have to hit the “delete” button. If your potential employers decide to check your page, it could cost you that job opportunity if what you have on display presents you in a bad light. It is not necessary, save yourself the stress. Keep it away from social media.

No Bragging

A lot of people have low self-esteem and measure love by counting the number of likes they get (even the married ones, shout out to those who learnt the hard way). If you go online to talk about how Mr A bought this for you and treats you like an egg with pictures to show that you are not lying, you have issues. God forbid that you have to come back to beg the public to save you when the beating becomes too much or the makeup can no longer cover your swollen eyes. Be humble and don’t present a made-up picture to the public, people don’t really care. A widely publicised relationship is like a garbage truck, everyone will have something to dump on it (no thanks to the comment section). A relationship is supposed to be between two people, not two people and the whole world. Keep it quiet.

No Parasites

You know those secret sources that the media quote when they drop hot gist about a celebrity’s troubled or failed relationship? Let us give them the proper name-team parasites i.e. fake friends who see you as an avenue to make cool money. Keep reasonable friends who understand and value you as a person. A lot of celebrities have a history of failed relationships because they made the mistake of telling a friend something they shouldn’t have. The secrets end up in the tabloids; a dish served hot and well garnished for the ever curious public. You know what they say about bad news. Lynx said that the Banky W/Adesua relationship was one secret that cost him so much to keep. He kept the secret and he will forever be seen as a good friend who put his friend’s interest before other things. Screen your friends and be careful who you give important information.

Bottom-line:

Relationships make the world go round but can become a thing of the past if it is not well-managed. Keep it quiet and simple. The world is not interested in your happiness or the lack thereof. They just see everything as gossip or entertainment. Keep it under wraps and remember that your relationship is supposed to be between only you and your significant other.

 

 

 

 

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