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7 Signs That You Are Not As Emotionally Intelligent As You Think

7 Signs That You Are Not As Emotionally Intelligent As You Think

Success in all walks of life; from your social relationships to professional demeanour, is strongly influenced by personal qualities such as perseverance, self-control and skill in getting along with others. Much has been written in an earlier post about what emotional intelligence entails. To conclude, see these 7 signs that spell you are not as emotionally intelligent as you think.


How often do you hold grudges? Research has shown that holding grudges stress the nervous system and over time causes havoc to the body. In fact, another research says that holding on to stress contributes to high blood pressure and heart diseases. Talk about it with the culprit and let go totally, most important because of your health.


How often do you get affected by past mistakes? It is safe to forgive yourself for your mistakes but it is wise to not forget them. By keeping your mistakes at a safe distance, you will be able to refer to them for future success. It takes refined self-awareness to differentiate between dwelling and remembering – dwelling which makes you anxious and remembering which makes you avoid the same kind of mistake. The key to balance lies in your ability is to transform failures into nuggets of improvement. This creates the tendency to get right back up every time you fall down.


A less EQ will strike you as someone who can’t get her thought conveyed constructively hence makes you feel misunderstood.  Even emotionally intelligent people know that they don’t communicate every idea perfectly. Capitalise on what people don’t understand, adjust your approach and re-communicate your idea in a way that can be easily understood.

Red Alert

Everyone has triggers – situations and people may push some buttons causing one to act impulsively. Emotionally intelligent people are aware of their triggers and use this knowledge to evade situations and people before they get the worst of them. Hence, awareness of your red alert makes you avoid them.


Emotional intelligence is not about being nice; neither is it about being unpleasant. it’s about managing your emotions to achieve the best possible outcomes. Sometimes this means showing people that you’re upset, sad or frustrated. Constant and deliberate covering up of your emotions with happiness and positivity is neither genuine or productive. Emotionally intelligent people employ negative and positive emotions intentionally in the appropriate situations.


Emotions come from within. It’s tempting to attribute how you feel about the actions of others, but you must take responsibility for your emotions. No one can make you feel anything that you don’t want to. Thinking otherwise only holds you back. In essence, emotionally intelligent people don’t allow wayward persons get under their skin.


Emotional Intelligent people can mentally draw the line between humour and degradation. If you have a firm grasp of who you are, it’s difficult for someone to say or do something that gets to you. So, if you are still squeamish and you think you are emotionally intelligent, think again!




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